"da happiest thing in my life is to b wif u"

our love story since "8th september 2000"

been a long.....tym

itz been a long tym i nvr post any blog here, well mayb i m very bz....wif ma wk,problems, & ma babe. still hvnt finish modified ma babe, yes! tom she gonna collect her GTI spoiler which she been wish for long tym (actually itz me). ok, after dat her wish is to change her shoes- 17" inch rim & tyres.....but i tink she will b gettin it on her 1st birthday on june & mayb sumone out there who is so nice to get for her b4 her bday...haha. besides dat gonna to send her for polishing,waxing & clean her up coz she is sooo dirty even after send her for washing.everytym it rain after she bathed.....sakit hati aku.

wat to do rite now in ma life there are only ma mum & her i care most.....i dnt care wat ppl gonna say or tink abt me coz at da end of da day they r not da one who support me anyway. my motto rite now is "juz go wif da flow" & "wateva"!!!! i m happy who i am & wat i m doin now even some ppl say negative things abt me. 'who cares'.....chalo

Sooooo Many Things 2 B Done!!!!

there r sooo many things to settle on my offday on next mon. means i hv to wake up early morng to settle almost everytg.

1. get solar film for my babe
2. install fog lights & wipper blades
3. get ma hubby display shelves for his bike toys
4. bowling wif aunt & cousin
5. keep track of my babe milleage for engine oil change
6. muz go appeal @ MP for my parking fine @ home!!! bodoh punya bdk premas takde mata ke, tak nampak dah takde pkg lot lagik, terpaksa la kena park illegal!!! carik pasal lah MAKRIB ni

da best part is my last min leave on end january '08 is approved!!!!! i m goin to GOA!!!!!! it was fully sponsored by ma aunt's fren.....bestnya. mayb itz tym for me to "unwind" myself after all diz happened to me. whereas on end febuary'08 i m going to Chiangmai wif Nora. but da only place i hv been wanting to go is Gold Coast-Movieworld, Dreamworld, etc......i tink i can plan wif ma aunt abt diz & can go after next yr bonus.....haha heard frm her it would be 6-8mths bonus! boleh lah upgrade to Honda Integra!!!! nvr mind la, so syg want to let go of my babe. juz maintain it sampai tak leh maintain. already bought me & mum da same baju krg but diff color for raya haji nanti. she was sooooo hapi wif it!!!!recently i lyk - WADAFARK sooo much!!!! u noe who.....k gd nyte, tomm BWN flite......sian

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i m so sick & tired!!!!

today is my offday after being wkg for so hard. i did CTU twice in 1week!!!!i can imagine how tired am i for doing diz damn long draggy flt. luckily i was wkg in biz class, haha! light load da max 5pax.....so i m tired of sitting in da damn cold galley watching digiplayer, read magazines, papers, eating & dreaming.....while waiting to land into SIN. da ofiz staff was so good to take me off frm MES nite flt on sun even though i have more resting tym.....whereas some crew r required to operate their flt next day......as long they have 10hrs rest, they can operate da flt. mayb da ofiz noe dat i work hard for diz few mths.....without reporting sick! now they giv me tym to relax..... but since last friday, my body is unwell, i had blocked ears due to ma flu & dry cough, my body is heaty @ nite & i had migraine esp after da aircraft have take off. i dnt want to report sick coz i want to work to da max diz mth......i wanna see my efforts. tomm doing SZX mrng flt, reportg at 530am & i have to b there by 515am. so, muz go out frm home by 425am. nvr mind, hope tomm capt will land into SIN early at 330pm & da eta is 350pm......so muz reach home by 5pm da latest & got tym to visit 'DI'.......wanna go today but i m sooooo lazy to go out lah. sorry dear, mit u tomm ok!

Miss Jepunlicious is very bzzzzz

let me juz update ma activities for last week:

1)went out wif lil sis to hubby's home & mit up wif mum-in-law for "SPA" session, bought a new T70 sony camera....cool! lastly headed to Ramen-Ten @ AMK for dinner.

2)mit up wif fren @ ecp mac after ma lgk flt & also test ma new cam on 'Di' bike & my 'Pooh' which was diplay on ma car dashboard.

3)visited the 'super import motor show' wif in-laws.....kecoh giler!!!!!!! then headed down to ecp for chix bbq,mee goreng, etc....

4)went to batchgal wedding at yishun- Ida & Ikmal. guess wat da rpg guys was escorting da bridegroom, omg! nasib baik yg saw me is da tall one, at least dia tak kecoh. kalo yg pendek nampak.....buat kecoh! bcoz of them, i cxl my trip to escort da bride to the bridegroom's side.

lastly, visited my hubby coz i miss him sooooo much & go back home to rest & relax!!!!!!!

"Red Light"

last sat went to ma cousin's place at cck for raya. today ma 1st day wearing ma new baju kurung which was ready tailor made a year ago. itz actually in pair but ma hubby cloth to sew for his baju kurung was missing in dat tailor shop due to flood last year. mayb its a sign dat he isnt celebrating raya diz year. well, sfter dat we went to his palace, recite doa for him & of course showing him ma baju kurung....."cantik tak Di, baju raya i ni?" then went home & went out again to mit ma in-laws at tamp & headed to have our supper @ jln kayu..... on mon otw home frm work, i shop ard in da duty free, bought ma powder & lipstick. since when i was abt proceeding home, its tym to "mahgrib". so while nak lambatkn tym after "mahgrib", i sat in da car reciting doa for ma hubby & cried coz i misses him sooooo much. cant wait for ma offday da next day
yet i m still so tired even though last 2 days was only short flights. mayb ma period is coming....yes itz true! it came 2weeks late, datz why i have been so restless & having backache often. tot of going out @ noon wif ma bro & grandma, driving ard to get familiar wif da roads as i always got lost! but ma body was so restless today. suddenly i feel lyk going out, pantat gatal lah! ma bro came to ma home in da evening juz after ma mum came back frm work. i drove behind his car heading towards his home @ sengkang. spend abt 2hrs there, watching a malay movie " Haru Biru" which was abt relationship, frenship & drugs....had ma dinner there & disturb his siamese cat! we make a move back to jrg after dat as i m wkg in early morning next day......how i wish i m off again tomm.......

on board now

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I Miz U Hubby!!!!!

tym passed so fast dat itz already been 100days on 22/10 hubby left me, family etc. yet till now i still cant accept da reality even though i tried. to me he is still alive & is beside me always lyk he used too. how i wish dat i could see him again . i m still da same, crying everynite thinking of him. i always recalled da past how we plan our future after marriage lyk having how many kids, which hospital to give birth to our child/children, names of our kids, staying in our own home, owning a car & bike, who is sending & fetching our kids frm schools, next honeymoon destination etc....but now all diz are juz dreams dat will nvr cum true 4eva. da most saddest thing came into ma mind dat in between 40days before he left me, he has been telling his frens dat i m pregnant! whereas i m not! how i wish i m pregnant wif his child now. it was ma fault dat i have been always thinking to save $ before i m ready to get pregnant. it was bcoz i want to be totally stable so dat i can enjoy ma pregnancy moments. "I m so sorry Di dat i couldn't bear u a child before & foreva. I cared too much abt ma work, shopping,enjoyment & i neglected ur wish." but i managed to fufilled his last wish to ride 1000cc bike & drive ma car even though it was juz a short tym. everyday, every min, every hr, he is always in ma mind. everywhere in ma room, car, purse displayed our pics. sometym i wish dat the person to leave da world is me instead coz i really can't face & accept diz fate. i m no longer a strong lady as b4 without u coz for da past nearly 7yrs, u r there for me "u r da pillar of ma strength." u r da guy who always saved me frm danger, gave me support, guided me, there r too much our ups & downs all diz while. no matter how big is our arguements, we still become hubby & wifey. u r so egoistic, u did tell me dat u will learn to b more romantic to me after we have married but u only learn to be lyk diz only during ur last 40days! why??? why??? why i can't feel all diz frm ma hubby a little longer. 40days r too short for us! i have been waiting diz for more than 6yrs! i was glad dat our wish during steady finally cum true.......to get marry in year 2006. "Alhamdullillah". we have been planning to end our relationship by marriage since da tym we fell in love on 8/9/00 ( da amt of ma dowry). "Di, i will nvr forget our memorable dates-----steady 08/09/2000, engaged 25/05/2002, rom 20/06/2006, wedding 25/06/2006 & da day u left me foreva & eva 14/07/2007 @ 1940-1950hr." "Di, i miss u so badly dat everynite i sleeps wif ur top which u worn on da last day we went for a wedding & da last day i spend tym wif u. it still remain unwashed, dats da only thing which i can sense dat u r wif me. i couldn't bear to give away all ur clothes, jeans, shirts coz most of it we have it in pairs, one for u, one for me. if i give it away, feels lyk our love breaks into pieces but if dnt give it away, no one is going to wear it as i have da same ones. lyk wat ur mum said, itz better to give away things i dnt nid coz if ppl wearing it, u will get good deeds. u no longer nid anything in da world xcept "doa". but dear dnt u worry, i will keep da clothes, jackets, helmets etc dat u loved & cherished. ok!!! also, i keep ur baju kurung da one we wore during steady, engaged & married. i will nvr give diz away till i m gone 4eva. guessed wat! i finally bought bigger wardrobe, which can stow our belongings under 1 roof! i already saved spaces for ur helmets & 1 hanging compartment for ur jackets & not forgetting our wedding gown & suit! i already inform ma mum not to let anyone wear or rent it at all! dnt worry abt me so much, i will able to cope without u sooner or later. da only thing i want frm u is to mit u to ask for forgiveness, i would kiss ur hands & feets. even if we can't mit, plz plz plz cum into ma dreams everyday, often. i was so so happy da other day dat u came into ma dreams, hugging me, u said dat u miss me so much & kissed me! it really makes ma day& i was really in good mood at work, even though ma body was aching all over due to da wkg hours.....really dear, no kidding!!!!! i wish to have diz kind of dream always, lyk wat u promised me to b more romantic & hope dat u keep ur promise even though u r in other world....ok! i still remember our tag line before we put down our phone everynite, everymrg after chatting-----"BYE, GOOD NITE, MISS U, LOVE U, MUACKSSSS! or after married before we sleep-----"GOOD NITE, MISS U, LOVE U & A KISS FRM EACH OF US". now, i can only kiss da giant pooh bear u bought for me, ma ugly pooh & ur favourite baby pooh. "dnt worry dear, i will try to visit u as often as i can while i m still alive ok! lyk how last tym we often mit, nearly everyday u fetch me frm work, shopping etc... ok! as long our wedding bedroom frame still hanging on wall, ma love for u still da same as before even though u r physically not here but u r mentally here wif me, always......juz lyk our wedding bedroom frame words----"FOREVER LOVE" & our signage "SHAFE'I LOVE FIZAH". i hope dat u remember me always ok! dnt worry dear, even though u r no longer ard, i will try to make an attempt to visit ur family whenever i m free & keep up our good relationship. i will also try to keep lookout ur dearest only lil sis......promise u ok!!!!!

Glitterfy.com - Gráficos em Português

Glitterfy.com - Gráficos em Português

I luv to spend & spend.......

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halo,been sumtym i nvr post any blog well let me tell abt myself wat i had done for da whole week.....

being bz wif ma roster which always require me to wk 3days straight instead of 2days. ok, dats good coz i nid to wk more flts, to earn more & to spend more. yesterday after flt, me & 2 other crew went walk ard in duty free to get her perfume & we went into coach. guess wat! i fall in luv wif one of da latest wristlet collection & till now i m still imaging dat. i wanna to get it but itz over ma budget, but i love it!!!! ahhhh! wateva it is, i will buy it tomm after flt then i will be relieve. my wants are more important than my budget....i had been spending a lot diz week even though i have already have everytg i nid. last wed after ma flt, i went to imm to buy another bedsheet set. instead of getting 1set, i bought 3sets! imagine how i struggling wif these bulky bedsheets which cums wif da thick comforter. luckily one of da salesman offered to help me to stow inta da car, if not i would have to make 2 trips to da shop. bought mum 1set bedsheet & a retro door curtain coz she been hinting dat ma room looks fabulous wif ma hearts door curtain. so i got for her one too & put it up on her door dat nite. she was soooo happy to get diz 2 gifts. i asked her to change her old style bedsheet which looked so dull. now after putting up da new bedsheet, her room looks more modern esp it goes well wif da door curtain. Awesome! not only dat i also bought pvc pictures holder which can hold 15pics which i hang opp ma bed coz i can see ma hubby at da moment i got up frm sleep. i display our pics wif all his bikes , frm day 1 till now.

not forgetting ma "SHAFEIQAH". his previous bikes for da past nearly 7yrs was aprillia, super4, rvf,125z(pony),k5, cbr1000 & also ma mazda3. i already have diz intention to display his pics wif all his bikes for quite sometime & now i made diz cum true. i hope dat he could see diz before he is totally far frm us soon.

today after went to hubby's homie juz now, mum & i went to 'gek poh' to buy ma air revitalisor solution coz mine already finishing. i luv da dewberry smell soooo much.....bought green apple & dewberry smell. besides dat i bought 2 malay vcd "kayangan" & "impak maksima". 1 is love movie & 1 is car racing movie. if only hubby is still ard, i believe dat he will love diz car racing movie. otw back to get into da carpk, i saw diz huge wardrobe & fall in love wif it. already asked da price, height & width i went back hm & measured da space. yes! it fitted ma in room & i juz nid to shift ma pc desk a little. love dat wardrobe coz it is huge wif many compartments which i can stow mine & ma hubby things, helmets, clothings etc under one roof! ok, will definitely buy it tomm after wk.....omg, i nid to recalculate ma expenses for diz mth again! wateva it is, i muz make myself happy again like before coz hubby isn't ard anymore to cheer me up & to depend on so, i have to do it on ma own now foreva . i m sure dat hubby will be happy when he see me dat i m happy & can be independent.....datz all for now folks.....chalo!

Ma 1st Tym Raya without ma Hubby

Diz is da 1st tym raya i celebrated without ma hubby. we had celebrated together since year 2000, da year we met & fall in love. i can't believe dat i have to celebrate diz yr raya alone! i really can't accept diz but do i have a choice??? me & ma pham-in-law went to his cemetery today, it was packed. lucikly i m not da one driving da car coz if i do, it will be worst. as normal dad-in-law droved whereas i can relax & juz watch da jammed.

reach to ma hubby's place, we start to put da flowers i bought yesterday @ imm while changing smaller notes for da children green pkt $$$ & also bought a new bedsheet set which i fall in love after saw it (lots of loves).met Nek Piah who was there earlier & we recite "doa" for him. at first i was proud of myself coz i dnt shed a tears but in ma heart, only god's noe how much i love & miss him so much. i was feeling so sad @ dat point of tym, i noe he was beside & watching us. maybe he is also feeling sad & crying. after completed our "doa", we r moving off to da next cemetery. while we are about to move off, ma lil sis- law cried & hold da "batu nisan". i tried to console her but i couldnt hold ma tears anymore. he was close wif her & he was her advisor too.

a lot of ma relatives came to ma place today, mum & grandma were so bz entertaining them. ppl see me happy & laughing but do they noe watz in ma heart? only him.....miss him sooo much. i had enough crying for da past 3mths he left us & now @ least i can control ma tears a little. rite now i m trying ma very best to be strong & live independently without him but i will nvr eva forget him.....to me, he is ma only hubby for life. even though he isn't here wif me but he will always in ma heart 24/7. left onlyda giant poohbear he gave me for me to hugs & to sleep wif everyday now .....i wanna tell him dat: maaf zahir batin & halalkn segala mkn minum & segalanya yg u berikn pada i....i love & miss u "Di"

Get Your Sexy Name

Get Your Sexy Name

our celebrity look alike.....

Berbuka Puasa dgn CIC

juz came back to @ 615am after doing COK. send ma library book @ aljunied library coz da date due is today & head straight home. da PIE was so bz at 7am! mayb thay wanna to avoid ERP. reach to ma hm @ 730am, took shower & straight to sleep till 4pm. got up, did ma prayer & got ready to mit up ma soon-to-be CIC.....wah, mcm gini i wk S1 position wif u ok!!!! Congrats to ma buddy cum colleague, Ms Ayu.....i knew u will get it babe! dnt worry, next year will b ma turn wearing orange! ha!ha! mcm real aje....insyaallah, dats wat ma hubby's dream & wish me to be in da future! Dnt worry darling, i will try ma best to get dat position one day.....but not now ok sayang!
we breakfast @ ecp food ctr, eating bbq chix & mee soto wif lot of chillies!!!!!makcik bahasakn kita la pasal mintak chilli xtra.......so far ma parking nowdays have improved & dnt nid to be stress so much lyk last tym where i would always asked hubby to park for me everytym i reach home. but now i can do it on ma own!!!!"keep it up Fizah" anyway ma lil Shafeiqah is quite obedient nowdays....since after send her to wkshop & been praising her everyday!!!!!"hai susah dtg la ni budak, mcm laki aku jugak"
after our meal, as normal we went to ma hubby fav place(mustafa ctr) since i m looking for a glue gun coz ma wedding bears kept falling off frm da tissue box & ma dashbord. tink da weather nowdays is too hot dat even i placed up da windscreen shade, da sunrays still got into da car dat caused ma bears to fall off. i bought again 2 types of bodywash as it is ma hobby. there is total of 7 types of bodywash in ma bathroom meaning, 1 type for each day.......tukar mood la kata kan.
ok la datz all for now, i want to get a drink & go to sleep......gd nyte...........miss u "DI" sooooooo much dat i cant describe. whereva u r, u will be a da only one for me, foreva......love u...muacksss

forever love

Fizah movie
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"Ma enjoyable Weekend"

last sat after wk, went to in-laws place & head dwn to bkt mrh car workshop to chk ma shafeiqah's left headlight. now i noe the place to send ma darling for check up if there is any problem rather then going to mazda agent coz it is so costly there! then while waitin for sunset to breakfast, we went to few mosque as mum-in-law wanna make donations. in meantym while otw to da places, i took a nap coz been waking up @ 430am for past 2 days. manage to woke up in one of da most unique in spore called"masjid hang jebat" which looks antique & in kampung style. not forgetting to capture few pics there......then we went to vivocity where we intend to breakfast in "2 hot 2 halal cafe". fortunately da place have already closed dwn coz there is no biz. dnt noe where to eat & walk ard searching a place to eat. at last we reach da harborfront ctr & saw the "breeks", dnt want to waste tym we immediately reserved a table for 5pax & ordered our food in advance. after the breakfast, we walked ard, went into esprit where "bibik" bought a jeans juz for da sake to get dat denim bag f.o.c (if only u hav spend $150). went to levis, to gat ma black jeans but ma size isnt available there, only in bugis outlet. i m so tired & da tym is abt 9pm thus juz forget abt it. i shall get it next tym then.
then we proceed to "jln kayu" to get our "sahur" meal & reach yis home abt 11pm, wash up & start da "fondue party".......which "bibik" been waiting for......... then to our sweet dreams.... on sun, da in-laws family sent & fetch me frm wk & as normal we went to "jln kayu" for our midnite supper cum "sahur" which da tym was almost to midnite. sooo nice of them to fetch me so late @ abt 11pm even they have to go to wk & skol in da next day....i appreciate it!!!!! how i wish ma hubby is still ard & there will be more fun wif u ard "DI".
on mon, tym for me to go home. reach home @ noon, parked ma darling, open up da mailbox & send up ma belongings. after dat when to jrg pt by bus coz i m too lazy to drive up there esp to park da car (faham2 lah), anyway it is also to save da parking fee......ha!ha!ha!
bought, few sachets of air-freshner for ma darling, blue bedsheet cover for raya(same color wif ma hubby new home,bed), make-up pouch, smaller purse,lipstick, etc....
tomm i m on sby, hope dat i dnt get call up so dat can join ma batchgals for breakfast.......ok dats all for now, nid to catch some sleep......gd nyte